Dealing with Stress

Every month Oprah writes a column called "What I know for sure" in O magazine. I recently heard her confess that sometimes when she’s trying to think of something to write she says to herself, " I don’t know what I know for sure. I don’t know a *#%* thing! Let me see what I can steal from somebody else." Well, I have to admit that I’ve had that feeling many times writing this newsletter. Usually, I wait for some kind of inspiration to hit me, which is why sometimes the newsletter comes out early in the month and sometimes later on!

This month I got my inspiration from both Cheryl Richardson (the renowned coach) and my own clients. You see, several of my clients are under a great deal of stress right now. The combination of increased pressure at work, especially for those in corporate positions, and the responsibility of helping aging parents is taking a toll. Our current economy and world situation are also not helping things either. I know they are not alone in this situation and that many could benefit from some advice. Coincidentally, tips from Cheryl Richardson about dealing with stress recently caught my eye. So this month I’d like to focus on specific ways to take good care of yourself during difficult times. With a little help from my clients and Cheryl, here goes….

When you feel overwhelmed, your body is telling you that it has gone into "fight or flight" mode. In this mode, you tend to shift your attention to the task at hand and neglect your self-care -- believing that if you just push through your stress, all will be well. For instance, many of my clients are working through lunch every day, not willing to ‘lose’ even 10 minutes to a break. But, it’s at exactly these times, when you're feeling pressure, that you need to return to basic self-care strategies. These strategies will not only protect your health, but they'll make you more productive and effective too. Remember: none of us is unbreakable – only Bruce Willis in the movie has that privilege.
Here are five things you can do:

1. Drink lots of water.
When your body is under stress, coritsol levels increase and it's easy to become dehydrated. When you're dehydrated your brain gets foggy, fatigue kicks in, and your productivity plummets. You can be experiencing mild dehydration even before you actually feel thirsty. Get a big bottle of water, keep it on your desk, and when it's gone, fill it up and keep on drinking. If you work near electronic equipment like a computer (which causes dehydration) you'll need to drink even more water.

2. Reset your priorities.
Throughout the day take short periods of uninterrupted time to reevaluate your priorities. Too often high stress levels cause us to revert to mindless activities that waste time like surfing the web or cleaning out a junk drawer. We may do the easy things on our list, so that we feel active, instead of doing the most important things that could relieve our stress. Shut off the ringer on your phone, avoid voicemail or e-mail, close your door if you have one for 5 minutes and ask yourself: "What's the best use of my time and energy right now?"

3. Play the ditch it or delegate it game.
When I feel overwhelmed I challenge myself to take one item off of my plate by delegating it to someone else or by realizing I just don’t need to do it at all. For example, you might ask a friend to baby-sit for an hour or see if your spouse can run your errands. You'd be surprised at how well people help out when you let them! Or, by rethinking an item on your to-do list, you may be able to remove it from the list all together. For example, sometimes you put a task on your list because you think in that moment there is no other solution. For instance, my son came home yesterday and said he needed a white shirt to wear for a special event at school the next day. Could we go buy one? I could have dropped what I was doing and ran out to the nearest store with him to purchase the item. I could have been caught up in his panic and just jumped into action to respond. However, by giving it a little thought, we realized that we could just borrow a shirt from a friend. So, look over your list and ask yourself if you REALLY have to do everything that is on it (is it really necessary?) or is there an easier way?

4. Take a break.
Get out of the office, even if it's for 5 minutes. I can’t tell you how many times I have offered this advice to my clients! It seems like it’s the new epidemic in corporate America to not go out to lunch. It’s considered unacceptable behavior to leave your desk, as if doing so means you are not committed to your job. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Working straight through for 8 hours or more is actually the least productive way to go. You absolutely need to take breaks. (You managers out there: If you want you employees to be more productive, encourage them to go out to lunch!) Shift your focus from work to something pleasurable: browse through a magazine, enjoy the weather or take a brief walk. You'll come back refreshed and better able to make wise choices. Breaks change your perspective. Breaks give you perspective.

5. Eat protein.
When we're the most stressed we tend to grab high carbohydrate foods to calm ourselves (for some, caffeine does this as well). Carbs (and caffeine) only provide a quick-fix energy burst. When your blood sugar drops shortly after, so does your energy and concentration. You need a longer, more even flow of energy. For this, keep good sources of protein handy. For example, put a bag of unsalted cashews or almonds in your desk. Pick up low sodium turkey breast and keep it in the fridge at work (or at home). You might even keep a can of protein powder handy to mix with milk for a mid-afternoon boost. Life will always present us with challenging situations -- a child who gets sick when you have an important deadline at work, or a co-worker who suddenly has a family emergency and needs to shift their work to your already full plate. You may not be able to control the circumstances that show up in your life, but you can control how well you take care of yourself while handling them.

Action Steps
If you’re in the midst of a stressful time, print out the following and tape it somewhere you will see it:: your daily planner, your desk, or your bathroom mirror. Use it to remind yourself to practice good self-care in spite of present stressful circumstances.

Dear _______, You are important! Please remember to take good care of yourself this week by doing the following:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Reset your priorities.
3. Ditch or delegate one task today.
4. Take a break.
5. Eat protein.

Have a stress-free 2003!