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Taking Care Of You
Yes, YOU. You are the most important person you have. Is that hard for you to hear? Do you feel a little selfish if you allow yourself to believe that? You are not alone. Your reaction is very common. To view yourself as "the most important" is definitely a shift in the way most people view the world. Look at it this way: you can't give away what you don't have. To love others, be there for them when you need to be, be generous and helpful, you have to have the love, time, generosity and help to give. When you don't love yourself, when you don't give yourself the time you need, how do you feel? Are you ready to be helpful? Are you in the mood to be generous? By taking good care of you, you can be there for the ones you love. We get most impatient, cranky and hard to deal with when we are not getting our needs met. This isn't to say that I'm giving you permission to be egotistical or to demand that you get your own way all of the time. What I am saying is that some of us tend to put ourselves last. And, putting yourself last does not make you a better person. In fact, it leaves you with less to give. For those of us that find ourselves in that category from time to time, it's more important, we think, to make sure that "other" people in our lives are happy. We want our children happy. (How often do we hear, "My kids come first.") It's more important to have our boss happy. It's more important to have a clean house and perfect yard so that our neighbors are happy. It's more important that our significant other be content. I'm asking you to take a step back and think about what makes you happy. Usually, it's little things on a daily basis that significantly increase our level of satisfaction with life. It's not the big car or even the promotion. It's probably more like feeling appreciated by your family or having more time with your friends and family. So this month, dare to start putting yourself first. Shift the way you look at your choices. Choose to spend your time and energy on things that bring you joy. Make more decisions based on what you want, instead of what others may want. You'll find you will have more of yourself to give. You'll find yourself being more of the kind of person you'd really like to be. THIS MONTH'S ACTION STEPS To get you started, you'll need to take a holistic look at your life. This will expand your view beyond your typical day-to-day. Here are the 9 key areas I'd like you to think about:
Step 1: Think about each area above. Rate each on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest or least satisfaction you could have in that area of your life and 10 being the highest or "it's as good as it gets." How many 10's do you have? Which areas would you like to work on? What does your life look like as a whole? Step 2: Choose the one or two areas that would really make a difference in your life, if improved, and write a goal (clear words, due date and measurable result) for each. Commit yourself to accomplishing your goal(s) by telling others in your life and/or setting up some support. Step 3: Finally, review those areas that you did not rate a 9 or a 10. What would you have to do, have or be for the area to be a "10?" What would a "10" look like for you? You are now defining success for your life. Have a reflective February.
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